Sunday, March 17, 2024

Lincoln City 5-0 Bristol Rovers


I arrive home on Saturday evening after Carlton's narrow defeat to Stockton Town. My mood darkens when I see that Ms Moon is watching irritating 'comedian' Michael McIntyre on the TV set. I crack open a strong can of craft ale and boot up my laptop. I scroll through all the scores. 'The Lincoln' have battered Barnsley 5-1 away at Oakwell. The time has come to make a call to get the band back together.

On Sunday afternoon I fish my phone out of my pocket and swipe down my list of contacts to the letter T. I press the green 'call' button. I feel my heart flutter, and my face light up, when the person on the other end of the line says "Hi Chap." This 20 year old diary has unearthed some blog legends over that period of time: Tosh, Big Glenn, Big Man, Tony Mac, The Taxman, Crazy Steve and Ms Moon are amongst many - but I'm sorry folks, nobody comes near to Trumpy Bolton. 


I'm not sure whether it's interference or incoherence on the line, but I piece together that he's on his way home from Kingston upon Hull after viewing a disappointing 2-2 draw for the faltering Foxes at the KC Stadium. Him and wife Jayne are stopping off in Newark-on-Trent for a 'couple of glasses' and a bite to eat. 16th March has been pencilled in for some time. The resurgence of Lincoln hasn't gone unnoticed. The following day I ring up the LNER Stadium at Sincil Bank. Two tickets are secured as is the 10.38 train to Lincoln. As Peaches and Herb said in 1979 'Reunited,' 

It's Tuesday evening and I'm slogging it up Talbot Street in Nottingham city centre, to the iconic music venue Rock City. Tony Mac and I, earlier in the evening, had sunk a couple of jars in the Barrel Drop and Yarn. Tonight I'm seeing a band I've watched many times over the last 40 years.


I was into Echo and the Bunnymen from the off in 1980. I remember the cool kids in South Wolds sixth form, in Keyworth, used to wear long green raincoats and combat trousers. As a teenager I wanted to be the Liverpudlian lead singer Ian McCulloch, who was as cool as Clough.

I recently read part one of the Bunnymen memoirs, written by guitarist Will Sergeant. It's a riveting, captivating capture of growing up in poverty stricken Liverpool in the late 60s and early 70s. Tonight, Rock City is packed to the rafters. It's fair to say that McCulloch is struggling to reach any notes of significance. The music is spellbinding. Show of Strength, Over the Wall and Killing Moon are my favourite three from tonight's two part set.


Wednesday is Ms Moon's day off and the beginning of a four day break from the shop for Sticky. We lunch at Delilah Fine Foods, on Victoria Street. Nothing tickles our fancy at the flicks. I've got a good 'un lined up for us both next week, called Cabrini.

I took a stroll down to Nottingham Central Library later in the afternoon. Former BBC Midlands Today, Radio 4 and Radio Nottingham broadcaster John Holmes is giving a talk about his 50 year career in the media. He tells some charming, amusing anecdotes about Spike Milligan and Joan Collins, but of course the best one is based around Brian Clough.


Cloughie and Taylor had arranged, at short notice, a testimonial game at The City Ground, and needed some publicity. Clough phoned up Holmes at home to pull him in for a favour. John asked old Big 'Ead into the studio for a phone-in with the supporters, so he could publicise the match.. Everything was going swimmingly well until Beryl from Beeston called in. "I've been a supporter of the club for over 35 years Mr Clough and was hoping with the development of the new stand that you might consider installing more than one 'Ladies' toilet as the queues are long at half-time and we are missing some of the game. Clough replied: "We won't be building any additional toilets, Beryl, and I suggest that you make time to go to the loo before arriving at the game" .. lol


It's Thursday and I'm on the train to Doncaster after bagging a bargain £15 choo choo return. God, I love my senior railcard. I'm meeting my brother for a few scoops and a mooch about. Donny has a population of 90,000 and is well known for its railway history and horse racing. 69% of its population voted to 'Leave' the EU. Famous people from the city include: Last of the Summer Wine writer, Roy Clarke, Jeremy Clarkson, Louis Tomlinson from One Direction and the footballer Danny Rose.

As I wait for my brother I stand in awe looking at one of the best murals I've ever clapped eyes on. It's a commissioned piece of urban artwork. It captures Doncaster's historic past and took the Nomad Clan two weeks to complete.


Around the corner is another beautiful piece of architecture, it's known locally as 'Little Plough' and was remodelled in the 1930s by Doncaster's largest pub owners at the time, Hewitt Brothers, from Grimsby. A few blokes start piling in for an afternoon of betting and boozing as the Cheltenham Festival is on TV. 

We visit a few other CAMRA pubs including Queen Craft where the barmaid excitedly told us that they hold comedy nights. My reply of "I presume all the comedians come from over the border, in Lancashire" is met with a stony face. 

 Alehouse

I say goodbye to Our Kid on the platform at the railway station. I enjoy a pint at the Draughtsman as I wait to begin my journey home. I even manage time for a swift one at the newly opened Brew Tavern, in Nottingham, which in old money was BeerHeadZ. It's located at the old Transport Police hut on the corner of Queen's Road.

Ms Moon and I have Friday tea time drinky poos at crowd favourite Lillie Langtry's and the more modern Copper City, which was Cafe Royale back in the day. We enjoy a lovely dining experience at French Living, a 30 year old family-owned restaurant at the top of King St. I plump for snails soaked in garlic. We wrap up the evening at the Fox and Grapes in Sneinton where I enjoy a pint of Dr Rudi Smash from the Lenton Lane stable.


It's Saturday morning and reports are coming in (by text) that Trumpy Bolton has been necking a glass or two, very early doors, in Spoons' Joseph Else since 9 a.m. Else sculpted the iconic Left Lion and Right Lion that form part of the Council House. An hour later I chance upon Bolton at a dive bar called Industry. I have half a Guinness as the train is due to leave soon.

For first time readers here is the drop your bacon sandwich news: for the last 45 years Trumpy Bolton's mission is to make a financial transaction in every village, town and city in England, Scotland and Wales. He has more box files than GCHQ. A crumpled atlas has each place visited highlighted. Every new pub is recorded in a book that holds more value than the Crown Jewels.


Sticky Tours take Trumpy down High Street, where there are a few alehouses he's never been to before including: Golden Eagle, Imp and Angel and Tiny Tavern. He engages with some Bristol Rovers fans in the pub and asks if Jason Roberts is in the squad. For any younger readers,Roberts is 46 years old. The whole pub erupts when Coventry City's USA forward, Haji Wright, scores a last gasp winner in an FA Cup tie at Molineux. 

We're sitting in our seats ten minutes before kick off. Bolton's beer count is at the bottom of this blog. The Red Imps are in a hot streak of form which has resulted in a late charge for a play-off position. It's been masterminded by their new head coach Michael Skubala, a Nottingham lad, who has pitched up from Leeds United academy, after serving time there under the popular Argentine, Marcelo Bielsa.


The Pirates of Bristol are blown away by a fired-up, foot forward Imps. They're 3-0 down inside 23 minutes and have two of their players hooked before the half hour mark. Remarkably honours could be even had it not been for some outstanding 'keeping from the Imps' 24 year old Danish stopper, Lukas Jensen.

Trumpy is miffed at the lack of alcohol available at the bar. He enjoys a light lunch instead (a bag of salt and vinegar crisps and a Twix chocolate bar). Things go from bad to worse for Rovers who miss from the penalty spot. Lincoln play the last 20 minutes with ten men after a couple of quick yellow cards for the impressive Ethan Erhahon.

Attendance: 9,392

Man of the Match: A return to form for Trumpy Bolton

Beer Count: a tin of Charnwood at home for breakfast, 2x pints in Joseph Else, a glass in Industry

5x pints on High Street, Lincoln. Tame by his standards, but no clubhouse to get

spangled in during the game. I'll get him down Carlton Town one day.

Sunday, March 10, 2024

Lincoln United 2-2 Eastwood CFC


It's Tuesday teatime and I'm hanging around at the bottom of Westdale Lane East, in Gedling, outside the Royal Kebabs takeaway house - it's a tad early for one of them. I've just demolished a chippy tea at The Plaice. The bloke who dished up was proper grumpy. He best cheer up for fish 'n chip reviewer Danny Bhoy, when he tips up on his next spot check.

'Chief Wiggum' arrives at bang on six bells. Club Shop Ken and Herr Harlow are waiting in the village of Burton Joyce. We sail through Newark-on-Trent as we zip up the A46 towards the cathedral city of Lincoln - for once Sincil Bank is not the final destination.


There is a massive Carlton Town connection and gathering at Lincoln United's Ashby Avenue this evening. Former Millers cult hero Jack Steggles is in the nets, whilst a number of Eastwood players have played at El Stadio Stokeld, including the joint managers. We have a quick chat with Carl, who is Jack's dad, and a lovely bloke.

After a light refreshment in the clubhouse I pay £9 on the gate and part with a few quid for some raffle tickets and a go on the golden goal. I won a tin of out of date biscuits here a few years ago. The Taxman and I often used to chuckle about that. 


I browse at the Eastwood CFC line up. An astonishing, jaw-dropping 47 different players have donned a Badgers shirt this season. This comfortably surpasses any previous records held by Barry Fry when managing Barnet or Birmingham City circa 1990s. It would also explain why they have only won two games in the last 15 outings. A measly 13 pts chalked up from a possible 45 pts available, sees them requiring snookers to reach the play offs, when only two months ago it looked a formality.

Hopes were high at the beginning of the season, as was the budget. The last few post match interviews, with the gravel-voiced Carl from Badger TV, (he should audition for a Guy Ritchie film) has painted a picture of Stan Laurel head scratching and Brian Blessed beard-stroking from the management team, as they mull over another disappointing outcome. Key players have left. A promising, aggressive, committed centre half is one of them, after being called out on Carl TV,  He'll push on and play at a higher level than Step 5.


Eastwood's players put a shift in for the first 45 minutes. 40 year old Aaron O’Connor is psyched out from the penalty spot by Steggs, who stands his ground and gives him the eyes. OC's stop start run up sees his spot kick smash into an advertising hoarding instead of the back of the onion bag.

They deservedly take the lead on 55 minutes through the on loan Eratt-Thompson. But their joy is short-lived when McMenemy evens things up after some schoolboy defending. Robertson looks to have earned the Badgers three deserved points. The goal of the game from Park, after a flowing move down the right, sees Lincoln steal a point. They’ll have to improve on Saturday when Deal Town from Kent rock up for an FA Vase quarter final clash. 


I somehow manage to visit Trent Bridge Cricket ground twice in the space of a few hours on Wednesday. I renewed my season ticket for the summer and bought some nice Adidas clobber from the club shop. Within a few hours I'm walking back down to the ground with Faggsy for a Notts Cricket Lovers' Society speakers' evening.

Five Live journalist and presenter Eleanor Oldroyd is tonight's guest speaker. She is staying with relatives in West Bridgford, before driving up to Media City on Salford Quays, where she will present the weekend breakfast show on Saturday morning. The BBC studios, in the north, have been christened by Radcliffe and Maconie as the Piazza de Stan Ogden, named after the layabout, chain-smoking, beer-supping slob from Coronation Street. 


Oldroyd describes her tough journey in journalism, as a female in a male-dominated industry. Fleet Street and TV closed any doors on her that were slightly ajar. It was BBC Radio Shropshire where she made her breakthrough. Later she moved onto Radio 1's Newsbeat team before joining Radio 5, which was later to become Five Live. She became the first woman to present Sports Report in 1995. Eleanor has also covered for the BBC the funerals and marriages of the Royal Family. I ask her what her favourite venues are. "Trent Bridge, Lord's and Adelaide", she replies, with an interesting anecdote to match each ground.

I have a lazy one on Thursday. I view the final episode of the excellent Channel 4 documentary: 'The Miners' Strike.' It's another tough watch. In 1984 over 73% of Nottinghamshire miners voted against strike action. Citing intimidation by Yorkshire flying pickets, and a flouting of the constitution, with no national ballot held by NUM President Arthur Scargill. The courts ordered that all the assets of the Union be seized. Thatcher's advisor, David Hart, played a major part in the break up of the strike. He was her eyes and ears on the frontline. Nonetheless, it was a very sad, tearjerking moment, when the mineworkers' returned to work, after a poverty-stricken and anxious year, without income.


It's Friday morning and I'm sat in Bear, a coffee house in Hockley, whose story began in the Staffordshire town of Uttoxeter. I've been tipped the wink by ex work son Tommy T that they do a mighty fine full English. He ain't wrong folks, as Mac and I mop up what's thrown at us.

We catch an early train to South Yorkshire, stopping off at Sheffield, where no excuse is needed for a quick jar in the taproom on the station platform. The next port of call is not far up the line. Rotherham has a population of 100,000. Labour hold a slender 3,000 majority with only 57% of the constituency bothering to vote. 13% more rocked up to vote LEAVE in the BREXIT vote with a 67% majority.


Famous people to come from Rotherham include: Lynne Perrie (Ivy Tilsley), the Chuckle Brothers, Jive Bunny, Paul McShane, Howard Webb and David Seaman. I'm in charge of today's itinerary, so anything could happen.

We stand on top of the railway bridge taking in the breathtaking view of a viaduct to our left and the forgotten Millmoor football ground to our right, with it's old school floodlights that tower above the town. After a wander up to the new ground we walk back into town to tick off pub number one, New York Tavern. The theme for the day will be Chantry Brewing, whose ales are scrumptious and to die for.


Across the road is the Cutlers Arms, it's a Grade II listed building and a CAMRA heritage pub. It dates back to 1825 and was rebuilt by Stones Brewery in 1807. It was saved from demolition in 2004. I love the Art Noveaux architecture and green tiles.

We head up, after, to the town of Mexborough, where the real Brian Blessed is from, as is former Formula One world champion, Mike Hawthorn. The two breweries we visit double up as music halls. So not only does the beer flow, but bands play too.. Tony Mac is mortified to see Nottingham St Ann's cheeky chappies, The Chase, are topping the bill later in the month. He had a strop at one of their gigs at Beat the Streets a few weeks ago,


It's Saturday morning and I'm knocking up a bacon and Stilton sandwich as I prepare a slow cooker Chinese chicken curry for this evening. The clouds clear and the sun peeps out as I make the 30 minute walk down to Stadio El Stokio. I grab the final can of Castle Rock citra craft ale. I catch up with Casually Dan who has it all on playing a DJ set whilst doubling up as Director of the Millers' Creche.

I stand with Smiffy who is doing some opposition scouting for Belper Town. Carlton are still rubbing sleep from their eyes when they get caught cold and concede an early goal. It should be two after another faux pas, but 'Felix the Cat' comes to the rescue. Playing with a stiff breeze at their backs the Millers gain momentum without troubling the Stockton stopper. Jebbison fails to get a shot off despite being one on one with the 'keeper.


I check on the half time scores. Lincoln are on my mind, as in City and United. I've piled on the Imps as they are in a rich vein of form. United have their big day out with up to 1,000 attendees expected.

Khyle Sargent scores a beauty to peg back the League leaders. The Millers can only hang on for a few minutes. A cross from the left hangs in the air like a pitching wedge shot on the 18th at St Andrew's. A big 'un, who plays in the heart of their defence, nods a looping header into an empty net. 

Attendance: 136 and 155

Star Player(s) Eleanor Oldroyd and 'Felix the Cat'

Sunday, March 3, 2024

Gedling MW 2-0 St Andrews


It’s been an intense TV soap watch for Ms Moon this week. Corrie’s Steve McDonald has taken his eye off the ball, whilst clocking up overtime by ferrying too many folk around in his Street Cars cab. I’m not sure how many weeks work painter and decorator Tommy Orpington quoted for, to decorate the two up two down terrace, but it's not just the wallpaper he’s been stripping. The former Weatherfield Rovers striker, an idol of Steve's, can certainly score on and off the pitch. They think it's all over for Steve and Tracy; it is now.

It’s Wednesday lunchtime and we’re heading up to Mapperley Tops in Ms Moon’s daughter’s car. It’s the same drill as last week: Capital FM is on the car stereo. They are spinning a rank awful version of Coolio’s Gangsta’s Paradise, which was a chart number one on both sides of the Atlantic in 1995.


I thought I’d have a gleg at how Coolio was getting on these days. Sadly, he died in Sept 2022 from an accidental fentanyl drug overdose, at the age of 59 yrs old. The rap that made him famous is a sample of an old Stevie Wonder song from 1976 called 'Pastime Paradise', which is from his classic album Songs In the Key of Life. Listen to it; it’ll blow your mind.

I switch off Capital FM as Ms Moon parks up. We walk through a passageway that leads us onto Mapperley high street. Lunch is spent in a popular Asian-fusion restaurant called Tamasha. We enjoy some tapas accompanied by some bread and soft drinks. A 20% discount voucher comes in handy when settling up the bill. Tamasha has a sister restaurant called Rawsha Grill, on Gordon Road, in West Bridgford. The Google reviews at 4.7 suggest a visit is well worthwhile. 


I had hoped to watch a film at Broadway Cinema in the evening. It’s a 2014 documentary called Pantani: The Accidental Death of a Cyclist. I’m gobsmacked to find out that tonight’s showing is completely sold out. Not bad eh, for a 10 year old film.

I rent it out on Amazon Prime for £3.49. Director, James Erskine, tells the tragic story of cyclist Marco Pantani, who became the first Italian to win the Tour de France and Giro d'Italia, both in 1998. It documents doping charges and Pantani's six year battle with cocaine addiction. I buy the book written by award-winning author Matt Rendell.

Thursday is one of the saddest days I've had for many a year. My close friend Steve Belz ('The Taxman) is laid to rest in the village of Stragglethorpe, close to Cotgrave. Steve was a season ticket holder at The City Ground for over 51 years. At the service he requested that some of the NFFC pre-match tunes were played such as 'Right Here, Right Now' by Fat Boy Slim and 'Born Slippy' by Underworld. It brings a smile to my face.


The wake is held at the Carriage Hall which is behind Perkins Bistro restaurant in Plumtree. I meet a few of Steve's colleagues from the Inland Revenue. We exchange amusing anecdotes of our time spent in Steve's company. I decide not to drink any alcohol, as I know I wouldn't be able to stop.

I feel sad, empty and flat on my solo journey back home. My mood isn't lifted when I watch the second episode of Channel 4's documentary on the Miners' Strike from back in 1984. It covers off the Battle of Orgreave, when Margaret Thatcher gave the Met Police carte blanche to behave in any way they chose. Pickets were charged by police on horseback who converged on the pickets from three fronts. They were ran back into town. 


123 miners were injured. 95 were arrested. 55 mineworkers were charged under the Riot Act which carried sentences of up to 25 years imprisonment. All 55 were cleared of the charges and set free from court. It makes my blood boil when I watch the TV footage. This was all on Thatcher's watch.

On Friday morning it's pelting it down with rain when Ms Moon and I dash out of a taxi at Nottingham railway station and onto an escalator that leads us up to the platforms. I'd earlier had an alert on my Trainline app to say that the Norwich to Liverpool train had been cancelled due to a signalling fault between Ely and Peterborough.


It looked like we were going to have to catch a train to Derby, in an effort to reach our final destination, York, where my brother Mark lives. There is a rare moment of commonsense from the usually underperforming and incompetent East Midlands Trains. They cobble together four carriages and find a driver, so we can get to Sheffield where we change trains.

The weather isn't much kinder to us in York. We dive into a cafe called Cocoa Joe's on Museum Street whilst we wait for 'Our Kid' to pick us up from outside York Minster. The incessant heavy rain puts paid to any visit to one of the abundance of National Trust gardens that are nearby to York. We drink tea and chit chat in Mark's kitchen until booking an UBER back into town at teatime.


The first port of call, on the cobbled streets of Jubbergate, in York City centre, is a Thornbridge Brewery tap house called The Market Cat. I enjoy a pint of creamy vanilla 5% stout called McConnels, as we sit at a table at the top of this three storey pub that's bustling with weekend revellers.

My brother very kindly treats us all to a meal at an Italian cellar restaurant called Delrio's, which has Sardinian influences. It's to celebrate my 60th birthday. We sink a couple of bottles of red wine during the meal. The scallops followed by medallions of beef, melt in the mouth.


The plan on Saturday was to travel back to Nottingham before dashing down to El Stadio Stokeld to watch Carlton Town versus Ossett Town, who are from West Yorkshire. Despite the valiant efforts of a hardy band of volunteers, the match fails a mid-morning pitch inspection. Realistically there is only other game I can go to, but complicated logistics will all need to fall into place.

Northern Rail do their utmost to muck my day up. The connecting train from Chesterfield to Nottingham is running late due to having 'too many trains to repair.' I've never heard so much tosh in my life. Time is against me as I scurry up Lister Gate towards Queen Street.


Ms Moon and I part company in the Market Square. The good lady is jumping on a 24 bus: destination is Marks and Spencer Food Hall on Victoria Retail Park in Netherfield. It's a very proud and exciting moment for Sticky Palms. A tear rolls down my eye as I set foot on the Gedling 45 bus for the first time ever. I know how trainspotters feel now when they chance upon a locomotive that they've never set eyes on before.

I make the short walk from Mapperley shops to Gedling Miners Welfare, Plains Road ground. Despite my best endeavours I arrive five minutes late to the game. The groundhopping Gestapo will haul me before a kangaroo court in the morning for a disciplinary meeting. I dash to the loo as that's been on my mind for a wee while.


There's a large Carlton contingent in attendance. Club legends Jon Hartstone and Clubshop Ken are sat in the stand. On the far side are Faggsy, Chief Wiggum, Herr Harlow and Lou Lardi. The visitors are St Andrews from inner city Leicester. It is them who look the more likely to break the deadlock in the opening half.

There's an incident in the clubhouse at half time. Carlton diehard Stuart from Stoke Bardolph has brought Millers legendary dog mascot 'Joey' (Barton). The Carlton mutt has kicked off with another dog in the bar. Joey has previous for banning orders in a number of East Midlands clubhouses including Lincoln United. I catch Stuart on his way out of the bar and ask him what's gone off. "I don't want Joey fraternising with any dirty dogs from Leicester" he remarks.


Two moments of class from the Miners put the game to bed in the second half. 'Kezza' keeps his head as he rounds the 'keeper and rolls the ball into an empty net. Substitute Gianfranco Ciaurro hammers home the final nail in the coffin with a smart finish. I can't 'arf pick 'em.

Attendance: 103

Man of the Match: Stuart, Joey's owner

Sunday, February 25, 2024

Mansfield Town 5-1 Salford City


It's Wednesday morning and I'm sitting in the front seat of a Citroen C1. Ms Moon is driving her daughter's car over Carlton Hill towards the suburb of Lady Bay - it's a well-to-do place known for cafes, takeaways and a couple of good watering holes. I clocked a breakfast place there last summer, whilst watching Notts 2nd XI playing cricket. It's on Trent Boulevard and called Bread and Lard Island.

Capital FM is playing some God damn awful tune, as we cross over a swollen River Trent, via Lady Bay Bridge. Remember folks, this is a 'radio station' that only ever spins the same six records every day. I still have nightmares, from years ago, when my two lads Jack and Joe were in the car, about a record they flogged to death by Swedish House Mafia called 'Don't You Worry Child' - it's absolute poppycock readers.


We are quickly seated on entry into the cafe. The eatery is stacked out with folk clogging up sought-after table space, as they tap away on laptops, whilst taking small sips of Espresso coffee, as they rob (take advantage of) the free wi-fi that's available. I gaze at a menu, chalked up on a blackboard, that hangs on the wall. I rub my eyes in disbelief that there's no full fry up on offer. You're quids in if the vegetarian option is your fancy. Two bacon and egg ciabattas, a latte and an Americano comes in at £30. The folk who run it are friendly people and the service is first-class, but I think I'll stick to greasy spoons in Sneinton and the city centre in future.

I was down Carlton Town's El Stadio Stoke, the previous evening, with Faggsy. Thanks to a massive effort from the amazing, dedicated supporters group, and with some advice from the ground staff at Trent Bridge Cricket Ground, the game manages to survive a pitch inspection.


'DJ Murph' is playing 'Echo Beach' by Canadian rock band Martha and the Muffins. It's a song that reached the number ten position in the pop charts back in 1979. Martha Ladly, from the group, later became a keyboardist for Scottish cult post-punk band The Associates, playing on their second album 'Sulk.

'The Millers are champing at the bit after a 17 day break. They steam roll a lethargic and unfit Bridlington Town on a pudding of a pitch. There's a lovely moment in the second half when David Adegbola, who has only been on the pitch for less than 30 seconds, skips past the full back before clipping in a cross that Alex Hardwick converts at the back stick. Local photographer, Steve McKeown, captures the celebration perfectly.


I'm up and at 'em on Thursday morning. I've four days off work to look forward to after clocking up 42 hours at the shop since Saturday. 'Crazy Steve' meets me at 7.45 am at our usual rendezvous point, Laguna Tandoori curry house, just off Maid Marian Way. Fifteen minutes later we are heading towards the City of London with Little Al and Cotgrave Trev.

We catch an overground train at Canons Park, disembarking close to Kensal Green Cemetery. It's bucketing it down with rain as we take siege at the William IV pub. As regular readers know the lads like visiting Victoria Cross memorial graves, whilst I'm partial to a celebrity final resting place. The boys have 17x VCs to visit in the nearby cemetery, whilst I have a small list including: Isambard Brunel, Charles Babbage, Danny La Rue and a cenotaph with Freddie Mercury's name on it, as a service was held here for him in Kensal Green. 


The lads only bag one VC and I manage to wade my way through the puddles of rain water to find the Brunel family vault before the search is aborted due to the worsening monsoon conditions. The rest of the day is spent jumping on and off tubes, visiting Grade II listed buildings that are CAMRA Heritage pubs. Elgin Arms, The Punch Tavern and the wonderful Blackfriar are all ticked off. We finish the day off at a delightful Turkish restaurant called Melissa that's located right next to the train station. Thanks for driving Trev and to Crazy too for planning.

There's no rest for the wicked. On Friday morning I'm lounging around in YOLK cafe with a pot of tea for one as I wait for blog legend Tony Mac to rock up. I demolish poached eggs and streaky bacon on sourdough toast with woodland mushrooms (a bit posh for you Sticky) before making the short walk to Nottingham railway station.


Coops joins us for 'Friday Two Monthly Club' as we catch the 10.12 choo choo to Leicester. We have a 30 minute wait at Leicester station before our train to the historic town of Stamford, in Lincolnshire. Tony Mac sniffs out a pub called Barley Mow where we have a glass of Marstons - it's only 10.45 am.

Chopper Harris joins us at Melton Mowbray. We alight at Stamford and walk over an angry fast-flowing River Welland as we stroll into the delightful town centre. It's a place where Britain's heaviest ever man (at the time) died. Showman, Daniel Lambert, weighed in at over 52 stone when he passed away suddenly. I remember when we were at school we sang "Who ate all the pies? Daniel Lambert, Daniel Lambert, he ate all the pies,"


The best pub in Stamford is the Kings Head. It's table service only, and to be fair to the bar manager he gives us all a fantastic customer experience. Tony Mac entertains the lunchtime drinkers by missing two steps and taking a tumble. By now we've been joined by Ackers, my best mate by school. Matt Limon finally tips up. Earlier he had announced that his mobile phone had been swiped at a curry house in D***y in the early hours of Friday morning. It transpires that one of his daft lad, pie-eyed, Sheep mates had mistakenly put it in his coat pocket.

The Jolly Boys trip continues at Oakham, in the county of Rutland, at the Grainstore and in Melton Mowbray where some cracking hostelries are visited such as: Anne of Cleeves, Charlie's Bar and the marvellous Round Corner Brewery Tap Room. On arrival back at Chez Palms it's a straight Red card from Ms Moon.


I'm a bit sheepish on Saturday morning. I apologise to Ms Moon about the previous night's drunken shenanigans. As a peace offering I rustle us both up a sausage sandwich as we catch up over some Holidays in the Sun morning TV. The Princess has rubber stamped a pass out for Mansfield Town v Salford City - I can't 'arf pick 'em folks.

I'm tapping on the Field Mill ticket office window at 1.45pm after the short walk from the station. I collect my ticket and take my seat in the lower tier of the Ian Greaves Stand after parting with £4 for a Lion bar duo and a bottle of Pepsi Max. The DJ's set isn't too bad; it includes: Blur, Arctic Monkeys, The Kinks and Manfred Man. He's no 'Casually Dan' though.


I love watching any Nigel Clough team. His recruitment is always spot on. Salford City arrive on the back of an unbeaten 8 match run since the shrewd appointment of excitable Scouser Karl Robinson.

Mansfield have been knocking on the door before finally opening the scoring. A pinpoint, flighted cross from Williams is glanced home by former Nottingham Forest striker Will Swan. The game is open and like a cup tie. Salford's Elliot Watt is pulling all the strings in midfield. He can thread the ball through the eye of a needle. Raking passes are punched out of his boot with either foot. The visitors equalise with a superb solo goal from rapid young winger Junior Luamba. The Stags restore their lead in the ninth minute of added time. It's been a breathtaking, pulsating 55 minutes of football.


Mansfield can breath easier now that the exciting Luamba doesn't show up for the second half. He'd earlier rolled on his ankle when falling over the ball. They pass the Ammies off the park. Clough's team grab the game by the scruff of the neck. They increase their lead, just shy of the hour, when leading scorer Keillor-Dunn rolls the ball into an empty net after another faux pas by the Salford 'keeper. Akins puts the game to bed on 69 minutes.

The visitors are reduced to ten men after a straight red card (trending this weekend) is shown to Vassell. Substitute Boateng makes it 5-1 at 5.05 pm - to be honest I'm waiting on the platform for my train home to Nottingham by then, where I'm joined by two students studying sports journalism at Derby University. They are great company for the 30 minute journey.

Attendance: 7.166 (152 from Salford)

Man of the Match: Matt Limon for the Currygate phone 'theft.'

Credit photos of Carlton Town to Steve McKeown. Thanks Steve.

Sunday, February 18, 2024

Carlton Town 1-3 Liversedge F.C.


It’s Tuesday evening and I’m walking down Burton Road, in Carlton, with Notts County diehard fan ‘Faggsy.’ The Millers are playing Liversedge F.C. from West Yorkshire. There’s only a small gathering this evening as the usual attendees will be at the World Famous City Ground for NFFC v Arsenal.

The game we're watching is thoroughly entertaining. Carlton are 2-1 down at half-time, with the visitors reduced to ten men after a rush of blood to the head for Liam Hardy sees two quick yellow cards -  young refs, these days, can’t wait to issue a caution. It spoils the game. The FA and their referee assessors need to have a brainstorming session sometime, as the standard of officiating, particularly the game management side and communication to the players, is mediocre to say the least. At Step 4 many officials seem to be unapproachable. 


Carlton fail to take advantage of having an extra man. A superb free kick from Liversedge’s Jack Carr seals their fate. There’s an extra bitter taste to the excellent real ale at the Old Volunteer, as Faggsy and I hold a post mortem over the proceedings.

Happier times are had on Wednesday evening at Jam Cafe, one of Nottingham’s coolest bars (of course it sells craft ales). There appears to be a vibrant underground indie scene in our fair city right now. Bloodworm headlines the gig. Their music sounds similar to The Cure’s debut album, Three Imaginary Boys. The lead singer’s haunting voice reminds me of Bauhaus’s Pete Murphy. They were a Northampton goth band from the 80s. 


Local band, The Rain Age, play a blistering set too. It’s dark wave Manchester band, The Solution, who steal the show, despite being third on the bill. They are definitely one for the notebook, providing they manage to keep their young, wayward singer on track.

I get in big trouble with Mac for buying him a 12% abv imperial pastry stout. He’s up at 5 am each day, whilst I’m on a day off on Thursday. Carlton crew, 'Chief Wiggum', 'Casually Dan' and 'Herr Harlow' are all in attendance at the gig too.


I grab some tea with my two lads and ex work son Tom at Trent Bridge Inn, in West Bridgford on Thursday evening. It ties in quite nicely with a speakers’ evening at Notts Cricket Lovers, in the Derek Randall Suite. There is a question and answer session with new Notts skipper Haseeb Hameed. He is still only 27 years old, despite being on the scene for what seems an eternity. He’s stepped into Steven Mullaney’s shoes, who will now captain the Second XI.

I’m on the choo choo train with Tony Mac on Friday lunchtime. We change trains at Leicester as we head over to the town of Hinckley, where famous people come from such as: William Bass (Bass Brewery), William Butler (Mitchells and Butler), Human League singer Phil Oakey, and Alan Taylor, the scorer of two Wembley goals for West Ham United in the 1975 FA Cup final


The pubs are delightful, particularly Elbow Room Cask and Craft, where I buy my beers from, after a tip off from programme editor ‘Big Joe’ at Carlton Town. They import beers from the USA that blow your mind and head off. We finish up at a CAMRA heritage pub called Wharf, located on the outskirts of the town. It has an interior of national historic interest. Hinckley certainly is another hidden gem.

It’s just after dawn on Sunday, and I’m on the phone to my taxi driver, who has overlaid for an airport run. It’s Tenerife time of year again. I’m 60 years old tomorrow and it’s Ms Moon’s birthday on Friday. The Big Man (Bish) is also out in the 'Reef' celebrating his 50th with the Squadron. We’re on the beach front by 3.30pm, at Los Cristianos, eating prawns at a restaurant called Chill Out. It’s 26 degrees with a cooling breeze. Had I come 24 hours earlier I would have witnessed another 0-0 up at CD Tenerife in Segunda B.


It’s Monday morning, and my 60th birthday. Lord knows how I’ve made it this far with my unhealthy lifestyle. It coincides with my 30th anniversary of no smoking, which I commemorate with four comedy drags of Ms Moon's fag. I celebrate in style with Ms Moon at a stunning restaurant in the harbour of a fishing village called La Caleta. We sit on a terrace just a stone's throw away from the Atlantic Ocean. A guy sat behind us proposes to his girlfriend. He then spends the rest of the evening facetiming his friends. I feel like lobbing his mobile phone into the sea.

I had a couple of pints earlier in the day with some of the bruised and battered 'Battalion' at a bar around the corner from the Cleopatra Palace Hotel, where we are staying. There's a lovely touch from Dafty who has bought me a smart Lincoln City away shirt with Palmer 60 emblazoned on the back. Thanks mate.


I receive some devastating news on Thursday. One of my best friends, blog legend 'The Taxman' (Steve Belz) passed away peacefully in the early hours of the morning. I managed to have a telephone conversation with him the night before we flew out to Tenerife. We reminisced about our groundhopping journeys around the Midlands over the last 15 years. He was such a kind, gentle and friendly man, who never had a bad word to say about anyone. I have to admit some tears were shed at the end of the call. Rest in peace, I will miss you so much, my friend x

I've lazed around the pool at the hotel for six days on the bounce. I read a brilliant groundhopping/travel book, written by Daniel Gray, called The Silence in the Stands. Gray travels the north of England and Scotland watching football during the dark days of COVID restrictions. It's a riveting read with some heart-warming stories told by the author.


The final night in the 'Reef', Ms Moon's birthday, is spent at the highly recommended Limonella Italian restaurant, which offers an authentic experience with a focus on recipes from the Amalfi Coast. It's a lovely way to end a fantastic holiday in our happy place.

It's back to earth with a bump on Monday. I'm on shop duty at the world's greatest newsagent, MSR Arnold. I breeze through the afternoon, happy talking with customers about football, cricket and the weather (particularly in Tenerife).


Carlton Town's Tuesday night fixture versus West Yorkshire big babies Pontefract Collieries falls victim to the weather after another deluge of rain in the afternoon. My backup fixture at Clifton All Whites is hosed off too. I settle in with another cracking book by Daniel Gray called Food of the Cods - a history of fish and chips in the United Kingdom. Ms Moon is gripped by a weeks' worth of binge-watching 'The Farm.' 

Wednesday is a day I have patiently waited for in a long time. I'm ecstatic when Trainline confirm that the £70 transaction has been made. I am now the proud owner of a three year Senior Railcard. Readers, you'll see me on more train journeys than Michael Portillo.


The rail card celebration (soft drinks only) begins at Baresca, a Spanish award-winning restaurant on Byard Lane, in Nottingham. Ms Moon's daughter, Becky, very kindly treats us both to lunch; and very nice it was too. The afternoon is spent at Broadway Cinema. I now have a concessionary membership which means I can view any film for £6. Today it's The Iron Claw, starring Zac Efron. It's the tragic, true story about a wrestling family called the Von Erichs. Wrestling hasn't really been my cup of tea since the unmasking of World of Sport wrestler Kendo Nagasaki in the ring at the Wolverhampton Civic Hall in 1977. But I'd thoroughly recommend this film.


Even if Carlton Town were to survive a pitch inspection there would be no Sticky Palms down at Stoke Lane this weekend as I've volunteered to do a 12 hour shift on Saturday as a colleague wants to take his lad down Forest. Friday evening is spent with Tony Mac in Nottingham city centre. We visit the Organ Grinder, Good Fellow George, Sir John Borlase Warren, Crafty Crow, The Castle and Junkyard (thanks for heads up Tim Widdowson re the tap takeover). We tip up at Neon Raptor at the fag end of the crawl for a couple of rocket fuel nightcaps. I can't 'arf pick 'em.

xxx